Navigating Unwanted Attention When Returning to the Office
Dear Amy,
I can understand how troubling it must be to face the prospect of returning to the office, especially given the discomfort you’ve experienced from a colleague’s behavior. Working from home has given you a reprieve from his actions, and the thought of encountering the same dynamic again can understandably cause anxiety.
It’s important to recognize that no one should feel uncomfortable or unsafe at work, regardless of whether the behavior comes from someone considered a “good person” or not. The fact that you find his actions unsettling means they are worth addressing, even if you find confrontation difficult.
You don’t need to handle this on your own. While it’s understandable that you don’t want to escalate things, speaking with your line manager or HR can be a constructive first step. In many workplaces, there are systems in place to address such concerns confidentially and professionally. You can raise the issue as a concern about your working environment and the discomfort you’re feeling. If you’re concerned about direct confrontation, it can be helpful to express your unease without focusing on labeling your colleague negatively.
If you’re hesitant to have a conversation face-to-face, you might also consider putting your concerns in writing, which can feel less direct but still address the issue. Explaining how his behavior makes you uncomfortable without assigning personal blame to him can help frame the conversation in a more neutral, professional manner.
Ultimately, you have the right to work in a comfortable, respectful environment. You shouldn’t feel forced to endure behavior that makes you feel uneasy. The option of continuing to work from home might be viable for a while longer, but it’s essential to explore all avenues to make sure that your workplace feels safe and welcoming upon your return.
Take care of yourself, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support if needed.
